Continued from The Son of Lucy part 1…. Read Part One
The journey to freedom got worse for Mr Lucy after joining Form 1. By the fact that he was Lucy some boys thought he was not a man enough. By the time he was joining form one, he was very careful, neat and smartly dressed, which were some of the qualities he had acquired from his mum. To those who know Lucy they know how organised and smart she is in whatever she does.
Mr Lucy had to drop all this ‘womanish’ qualities to prove he was a man enough. First, he lost his sense of smartness and became careless. It was easier for you to spot him with uncombed hair and unpolished shoes. Secondly, he joined a tough game “hockey” to prove he was not soft as a woman. He also assumed leadership positions to dominate over his class mates and prove to them that he was a man who could control men. In form four, he was a class prefect and he made some guys suffer to pay cost for his journey to manhood. In the Debate club, he was also speaker and he made pretty sure he had the final say as a man on the motion.
He utilised every moment available to address his fellow students *Somehow he was seeking popularity and defending his identity. He always preached in school assemblies and CU services, gave testimonies in like all fellowships, answered like every question in class, contributed in Kamukunjis and dominated in Prefects meetings. At the same time he was hard working and read widely and wildly.
However, the motive behind his reading was not to make it to the university but to intimidate other boys with his performance. Education to him was competitive ground and he was not interested in the grades but the position. He always made sure that out of the three streams of 120 students he was top 10. This gave him enough bragging rights among other students *actually he was quite a bragger to gain self-esteem.
Mr Lucy preached from Form1 to Form 4 but he had not received Christ, he preached from the knowledge of the word. As the KCSE drew near, he reflected on his life in high school and he felt helpless. There was a void in his soul that needed to be filled with something. There was a dark corner that needed some light. He tried a lot of things but it didn’t work until he tried prayers and was convicted to receive Christ. The conviction was so strong that he could not wait for an altar call on Sunday, so he stormed in to the school chaplain’s office at break time and without greetings he demanded “I want to be saved”.
“Mr Lucy you mean after all those powerful sermons you are not saved?” the shocked Chaplain asked. Mr Lucy nodded his head and when the Chaplain saw it was serious he was overcome by emotions and shed tears. That was the first time Mr Lucy saw a real man cry and he was like ‘so men with fathers also cry and have soft parts?’
The Chaplains tears inspired him until he smiled. The Pastor later led him in a prayer of confession and in that moment he received Jesus Christ as his personal saviour. Something in him happened and he was happy and the feeling of proving he was man enough was long gone. Through salvation, he met a man who died for the whole world not to prove he was a man but out of love. Through this love of Christ, Mr Lucy understood that he is son of a powerful father who created other fathers. But it was late that he had already registered for his KCSE without a surname.
Being the son of a Single Mother started making sense to him and in the University. In the University, he introduced himself as Lucy and he always made sure people heard the word ‘Lucy’ correctly. The University was very accommodative which he attributes to it diversity.
All was well until in second year he broke up with certain lady he was dating. The breakup was not a big deal to him because its goal was not marriage, but the words that the lady uttered to him changed everything. ‘You are not a man enough and you don’t know how to treat women because you behave like a one’
That statement was not new to him but it crushed him to bits, because it was uttered by somebody he loved with all his heart. Mr Lucy from that point started to keep his beards to prove that he was not a woman but a real man with award winning beards. Somehow he lost his sense of dressing again and it got worse last year where he could just walk to the class shaggy and badly dressed and cared less who was watching.
That was the last relationship he had been in up-to-date. He has been running away from love. Even in cases where it was so evident he was in love with somebody, he would deny it. Mr Lucy has being fighting a lot battles just to make singleness look good. Last year he started a blog post dubbed “Why Stay Single” just to validate singleness.
God is good because right now after a lot of prayers and mentorship through books he has been able to come back to his senses. He has been able to get over the bitterness by letting it go and letting Jesus take the wheel. However, he is very worried about others who may be going through the same situation. He asked me to write this blog post and attach my own take.
No one in this world choose which family to be born in. None wrote an application letter to apply to be born in a certain family. Nobody choose not to know his dad. Some of us given a second chance we would opt to be born somewhere else where we think peace exists.Birth is not a subject to second chance and thus there is no room for change. When a room of change does not exist in our lives; contentment is required, positive thinking is demanded and being a dreamer is a must.
So if you are like Mr Lucy, start by accepting your situation. Secondly, look at your situations as a Gods plan in your life because he knew you before you were formed in your mother’s womb. Always remember you had a purpose before anyone had an opinion. Finally dream and dream big for a better tomorrow. Make sure your kids don’t go through the same situation
And finally to the guys like Omondi and John Ng’ang’a in his book ‘Finding a life Partner’ Page 11-16… Stop giving birth to myths and stereotypes about Boys with female names or about men brought up by single mothers. You know nothing about them! Go ask Mr. Lucy…..
And he will tell you “Enough is Enough! We have heard enough! You better keep quiet before we make you shut up! If you got an attitude about us keep it to yourself, you may need it in future. Respect Sons of single Mothers because we are about to change the world to a better place…. !!